The purpose of this blog is to share my search for God in the midst of major transition and shift in my life, and to share the things I learn with those who want to walk along as well. What I hope to gain: I want direction. I want purity in the direction. I want to walk with God all the time, not just when I slow down to listen, I want to learn to listen to that voice all the time.
My husband gave me a book for Christmas which he often does. I usually think, "Oh, another book," and then what do ya know, its a book that changes me. For the best, I hope. This one is titled "Reordering Your Day" by Chuck Pierce. At first I thought, well, this is impossible. The book speaks of four Biblical "Watches" in the night. Praying and reading the Bible four times a night - impossible! That was my first reaction. Then I began to think, "why not?" For twenty one days. Why not. I will live with long periods of silence (since most of my audio is broken anyway) and listening. I will wake in the night I hope for 21 nights. And I will expect a miracle in my life.
Around 6 pm I read Matthew 14:50-23 - Jesus pulled aside to a deserted place and went to the Mountain by himself to pray. I tried to quiet myself and asked God to remove all distractions. I began to twitch, my eyes wandered, my mind even more so, and I felt like a bit of a failure.
11:00 pm I read Exodus 11, emphasizing verse 4. Moses went out to the midst of Egypt at midnight. I asked God to intervene and deliver me. Considering my job or lack of it situation and the attacks I've had, ruptured discs, accusations, etc., I sincerely want intervention. I still feel midly distracted
3:00 am - Cockcrow - when Peter denied Jesus - I felt a bit of grief thinking how lazy my mind had become in spiritual things because of all I have been battling and realized the battle would be easier with God as my general in command.
6:39 am - well, I couldn't sleep anyway, so I battled an upset stomach and read Exodus 14, especially verse 24 when God looked down at the approaching Egyptians and "troubled" them. I asked Him to likewise trouble those enemies coming after me, I prayed for them to be confused. Well, yah, God go for it! Part of this watch though said to wait for the presence of God. I waited and waited. Couldn't sleep. Couldn't feel Him. But I knew He heard my words.
I'm waiting. I have a sense of anticipation and excitment!
So what did the day bring? The Sheriff knocking at my door wanting a key I forgot to turn in at the office. He was kind and sort of apologetic, bless his heart. But I had a horrible dread of him showing me a search warrant - which was uh, definitely unwarranted - he took the key and left. I thought, ok I prayed for God to vanquish my enemies, essentially, and one of them sends law enforcement to my door rather than to wait for me to walk the key in to her office in the afternoon.
My lesson: Don't expect a miracle the first day out. Maybe the short visit with the Sheriff was a miracle. Don't judge anything yet. Keep on trusting - God, and my "gut."